Why You Might Not Feel Proud
If you're like me, you have trouble being proud of yourself. Despite real achievements, you feel like an imposter who just got lucky.
I have done enough things I could be proud of:
I have won multiple weightlifting competitions, even placing second in the state championship.
I have earned multiple promotions in my career, sometimes only a few months apart.
I have earned my bachelor's degree while working and financing it myself.
I have built a 6-figure net worth before turning 30 on an average salary.
I closed numerous deals in my corporate career and was responsible for over a million in revenue.
Yet, I don't feel proud - ever!
The competitions I won? Just good genetics and perfect build for weightlifting. The competition wasn't even that big.
The promotions I earned? Pure luck! Right place, right time, with tools others didn't have access to.
My bachelor's degree? I was just naturally gifted with good memory. Where I struggled, I had support that carried me through.
You feel like an imposter. You never feel good enough. You don't carry yourself with pride and confidence.
Here's What This Really Costs You
You become your own worst enemy. You chronically battle low confidence, resentment, and disappointment that poison every aspect of your life.
Every time someone gets promoted or receives more recognition than you, you resent them. Yet, you never say anything. And when you get it? You don't celebrate - you just think it was about time.
You dismiss every win and amplify every competitor's success. This pattern sabotages your relationships, stunts your career growth, and robs you of daily happiness.
You never feel like you have any real skills, nothing you're truly good at.
The Real Reason (And Solution)
Here's what I noticed: Every time I didn't feel proud of myself, every time I thought I just got lucky - I didn't give it my all.
Yes, I worked my ass off in the gym for years. Yes, I busted my ass at work 50+ hours a week. Yes, I studied every week for my bachelor's.
But I never really gave it my all.
I skipped stuff in the gym or just went through the motions instead of deliberate practice. I had tools others didn't have at work but didn't hone my craft. I cheated on exams. I took shortcuts.
The solution:
Choose ONE thing to focus on completely - not half-heartedly, but with everything you've got
Document your effort and obstacles daily - write down what you did, what you overcame, what you learned, all the times you doubted yourself and did it anyway
Build your "undeniable proof" file - collect evidence of your real work so when that little voice says "this was luck," you can tell it "fuck you"
Actually build a skill you can be proud of. Progress builds happiness!
Stop the negative self-talk and remind yourself: I deserve this. I worked for this. I built this!
Give yourself compliments for the work you've done and actually allow yourself to feel proud.
Pride isn't bad if it's earned.
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